JOURNALING THE JOURNEY: intro and overview
Living with Open Hands . . .
in a world of clenched fists . . .
The open hand is a tangible expression
of an open mind and an open heart.
Question, examine, think, learn, grow . . .
Thoughts and Meditations on Life.
"Poetry may make us . . . a little more aware of the deeper, unnamed feelings
which form the substratum of our being to which we rarely penetrate;
for our lives are mostly a constant evasion of ourselves."
T. S. Eliot, Nobel Prize acceptance speech, 1948
in a world of clenched fists . . .
The open hand is a tangible expression
of an open mind and an open heart.
Question, examine, think, learn, grow . . .
Thoughts and Meditations on Life.
"Poetry may make us . . . a little more aware of the deeper, unnamed feelings
which form the substratum of our being to which we rarely penetrate;
for our lives are mostly a constant evasion of ourselves."
T. S. Eliot, Nobel Prize acceptance speech, 1948
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JOURNALING THE JOURNEY
Why I Write . . .
For me, it is mapping a journey . . .
I've been blogging since April Fool's Day 2006 (blog #1).
It has become a way for me to find my voice and to give voice to my
questions;
a journey
from dogmatism and certainty to inquiry and dialogue,
from living with clenched fists to living with open hands.
When I started writing, little did I know what the future had in store . . .
a deep and excruciating depression, divorce, job loss, loss of health
benefits, foreclosure of the home my children were born in, and worst
of all, losing my kids half of the time. My wilderness was my Dark Night
of the Soul. It was like an earthquake that left nothing unturned.
For me, blogging is mapping a journey, not unlike the Israelites'
journey in the wilderness. They could not see around the bend. Many
surprises were in store. . . both good and bad.
Whenever a significant event happened they were admonished to
REMEMBER. Each learning experience imparted a new lesson, a new
measure of wisdom that they must not FORGET. As a tangible
reminder of these life remembrances, they built a monument, pillar of
rocks, so they could return to them (physically or mentally) to draw
deeply from the wisdom that was imparted.
Along my journey, each of my blog entries is another pillar of rocks, a
monument to a new insight, a new learning experience (usually born
out of pain), a new question (mostly), a new perspective, a new
surprise (good or bad). Therefore, I return to each of them regularly . .
. lest I forget . . .
I must remember to befriend life's dark places ,
lest I forget the truths hidden there.
I must remember to face life's pain ,
lest I forget the pain of others and the learning that pain imparted on me.
I must remember to embrace life's mystery,
lest I forget and think I KNOW . . .
I must remember to sit with my own pain, in silence, listening to what it
has to teach me.
I must remember to sit with the pain of others, being there with them
Why I Write . . .
For me, it is mapping a journey . . .
I've been blogging since April Fool's Day 2006 (blog #1).
It has become a way for me to find my voice and to give voice to my
questions;
a journey
from dogmatism and certainty to inquiry and dialogue,
from living with clenched fists to living with open hands.
When I started writing, little did I know what the future had in store . . .
a deep and excruciating depression, divorce, job loss, loss of health
benefits, foreclosure of the home my children were born in, and worst
of all, losing my kids half of the time. My wilderness was my Dark Night
of the Soul. It was like an earthquake that left nothing unturned.
For me, blogging is mapping a journey, not unlike the Israelites'
journey in the wilderness. They could not see around the bend. Many
surprises were in store. . . both good and bad.
Whenever a significant event happened they were admonished to
REMEMBER. Each learning experience imparted a new lesson, a new
measure of wisdom that they must not FORGET. As a tangible
reminder of these life remembrances, they built a monument, pillar of
rocks, so they could return to them (physically or mentally) to draw
deeply from the wisdom that was imparted.
Along my journey, each of my blog entries is another pillar of rocks, a
monument to a new insight, a new learning experience (usually born
out of pain), a new question (mostly), a new perspective, a new
surprise (good or bad). Therefore, I return to each of them regularly . .
. lest I forget . . .
I must remember to befriend life's dark places ,
lest I forget the truths hidden there.
I must remember to face life's pain ,
lest I forget the pain of others and the learning that pain imparted on me.
I must remember to embrace life's mystery,
lest I forget and think I KNOW . . .
I must remember to sit with my own pain, in silence, listening to what it
has to teach me.
I must remember to sit with the pain of others, being there with them
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If I loose my grip . . .
will I take flight?
(Bruce Cockburn,
Strange Waters lyrics)
will I take flight?
(Bruce Cockburn,
Strange Waters lyrics)
Oh Love that fires the sun
keep me burning
Bruce Cockburn
(Lord of the Starfields)
keep me burning
Bruce Cockburn
(Lord of the Starfields)
Gotta search the silence
of the soul's wild places
to find a voice
that'll cross the spaces
Bruce Cockburn
(Justice)
of the soul's wild places
to find a voice
that'll cross the spaces
Bruce Cockburn
(Justice)
Comments:
(Please leave comments by clicking
here)
"I like reading your blogs. Every time I read your blogs I get
something new out of them. So I'm printing them off" . . . 60
pages later . . .
Rest in peace, Grandma, I miss you!!!
At age 90, she was my first blog fan!!!
I stumbled on your blog....and was blown away by your depth
and honesty. Wow! You seem to have followed that less well
traveled path I myself have traveled, yet stumbled off of in
search of "security"...you eloquently express many thoughts I've
pushed down over the years as I immersed myself in raising a
couple of kids and letting myself get sucked into the mundane
side of domesticity and work...I read most of your myspace
blog....what an amazing journey you have taken and continue to
take. Keep exploring the hard questions and working through
the rawness of life lived beyond the surface...inspiring!
Kay
letting you know the further I look into your blog the more I feel I
am coming home ....
Laurel
Ron, your blog spoke to that buried part of my soul in a deep
way....I felt tears of empathy for the courageous journey you so
eloquently express--what a precious gift of vulnerability you
have given. I'm blown away to find somebody from my youth
who might actually be able to understand ME, the me that
nobody knows or understands.
Kay
Your words are mesmerizing. Honestly, I wish I could
communicate my thoughts into words like that . . .
Some people try to use tricks to do what you did. Some people
will use huge, big words and complex analogies in an attempt
to sound intelligent, and end up not saying much at all. Some
people like to employ 'willfull ignorance' and convince
themselves that their sub-par writing good enough (just try
reading Twilight, lol). but with your words, there was the perfect
balance of intellect, simplicity and heart for me to see what you
were trying to say. And that, my friend, is what mesmerized me.
You've inspired me. I am going to start a blog, it's going to be
on my fanpage and on a separate blog too. It might not be
amazing, but I want to do it. Thank You!
Khadija
I have been reading your blog lately. I just wanted to let you
know that I am finding so much comfort and hope as I do so.
The single parent and gentleness writings have been so
helpful of late. Helpful to me because you are going beneath
the placating & accepted surfaces put on these subjects. You
know of the pain and the reward if you live it. It is encouraging to
know there are others who ride through the storms and that our
reacting is legitimate.
Laurel
Comment on "Bullet Holes and Poverty"
A very powerful post on your blog…you captured the craziness
and the heartbreak of it all quite well. It is a good piece that
should be more widely read. Thanks for putting it out there.
Chris
Comment on "Malignancy":
I think you have done a very good job of describing one of the
greatest problems of our modern world. I think each one of us
has to realize that we can cure it in every conversation, every
interaction, and every moment that we spend with others.
Power Ranger Freak
I believe your blog will be a source of inspiration for her.....if it
could pull me right out of the fog I've been stuck in for a decade
now, it can certainly help inspire her to live the courage of her
convictions.
I feel like I have been reborn--not 'born again' but awakening
what had gone dormant......I feel the urge to have an exchange
with you about each one....to slowly digest them and let them
water my dry spirit.
I am so awed at the poetry of your work--how you combine the
visual image with the quotes with your own reflections and
questions--so powerful--such a gift!
Kay
Comment on "This Prey of Grace"
Wheeeewwww! I am blown away by this one my brother! You
have it. You have brought to the place of Peter and of Paul. You
have found the true God-man, the Christ. So few truly tread
there. They dance the fringe of it, fearful of the Unknown depths
of service to a true Master, true Lord. But you have seen it. It is
yours for the taking. Do not hesitate any longer...TAKE IT!
Peace of Christ to you, my friend,
David
Comment on "Seeing"
Hey Ron,Geez, after reading this, it makes one wonder, can we
really see at all? Keep on bloggin',
David
I thank you for sharing your journey online....it really has
inspired me to "lean into my future" with new enthusiasm.
Kay
Comments on "living the questions"
This is beyond amazing. Thanks for posting! Is this in a book?
Or where can I find this article?
Marty
I crave for more!! And will follow to find more…knowing it’s out
there:)
Lynn
Comment on "the way of the brokenhearted"
Very POWERFUL and so true!! I loves the Psalms too and know
that Gods plan is perfect! Tho He allows us storms to weather
through….His promise is that He is right there to carry us
through…if we let Him with a willingness. He has carried me
through many tough storms and through each one of them I
learn so many new things . . . Sir, I want to thank you for your
words of wisdom and too I thank God for bringing you into my
life, so I could read the beauty here on this page:)
God bless you,
Lynn
Comment on "the progression toward compassion"
This was very powerful. I’m glad I found you on WordPress as I
used to follow you on Xanga. Thanks for your work. Your
writings are both convicting and encouraging.
Captain Quaker
(Please leave comments by clicking
here)
"I like reading your blogs. Every time I read your blogs I get
something new out of them. So I'm printing them off" . . . 60
pages later . . .
Rest in peace, Grandma, I miss you!!!
At age 90, she was my first blog fan!!!
I stumbled on your blog....and was blown away by your depth
and honesty. Wow! You seem to have followed that less well
traveled path I myself have traveled, yet stumbled off of in
search of "security"...you eloquently express many thoughts I've
pushed down over the years as I immersed myself in raising a
couple of kids and letting myself get sucked into the mundane
side of domesticity and work...I read most of your myspace
blog....what an amazing journey you have taken and continue to
take. Keep exploring the hard questions and working through
the rawness of life lived beyond the surface...inspiring!
Kay
letting you know the further I look into your blog the more I feel I
am coming home ....
Laurel
Ron, your blog spoke to that buried part of my soul in a deep
way....I felt tears of empathy for the courageous journey you so
eloquently express--what a precious gift of vulnerability you
have given. I'm blown away to find somebody from my youth
who might actually be able to understand ME, the me that
nobody knows or understands.
Kay
Your words are mesmerizing. Honestly, I wish I could
communicate my thoughts into words like that . . .
Some people try to use tricks to do what you did. Some people
will use huge, big words and complex analogies in an attempt
to sound intelligent, and end up not saying much at all. Some
people like to employ 'willfull ignorance' and convince
themselves that their sub-par writing good enough (just try
reading Twilight, lol). but with your words, there was the perfect
balance of intellect, simplicity and heart for me to see what you
were trying to say. And that, my friend, is what mesmerized me.
You've inspired me. I am going to start a blog, it's going to be
on my fanpage and on a separate blog too. It might not be
amazing, but I want to do it. Thank You!
Khadija
I have been reading your blog lately. I just wanted to let you
know that I am finding so much comfort and hope as I do so.
The single parent and gentleness writings have been so
helpful of late. Helpful to me because you are going beneath
the placating & accepted surfaces put on these subjects. You
know of the pain and the reward if you live it. It is encouraging to
know there are others who ride through the storms and that our
reacting is legitimate.
Laurel
Comment on "Bullet Holes and Poverty"
A very powerful post on your blog…you captured the craziness
and the heartbreak of it all quite well. It is a good piece that
should be more widely read. Thanks for putting it out there.
Chris
Comment on "Malignancy":
I think you have done a very good job of describing one of the
greatest problems of our modern world. I think each one of us
has to realize that we can cure it in every conversation, every
interaction, and every moment that we spend with others.
Power Ranger Freak
I believe your blog will be a source of inspiration for her.....if it
could pull me right out of the fog I've been stuck in for a decade
now, it can certainly help inspire her to live the courage of her
convictions.
I feel like I have been reborn--not 'born again' but awakening
what had gone dormant......I feel the urge to have an exchange
with you about each one....to slowly digest them and let them
water my dry spirit.
I am so awed at the poetry of your work--how you combine the
visual image with the quotes with your own reflections and
questions--so powerful--such a gift!
Kay
Comment on "This Prey of Grace"
Wheeeewwww! I am blown away by this one my brother! You
have it. You have brought to the place of Peter and of Paul. You
have found the true God-man, the Christ. So few truly tread
there. They dance the fringe of it, fearful of the Unknown depths
of service to a true Master, true Lord. But you have seen it. It is
yours for the taking. Do not hesitate any longer...TAKE IT!
Peace of Christ to you, my friend,
David
Comment on "Seeing"
Hey Ron,Geez, after reading this, it makes one wonder, can we
really see at all? Keep on bloggin',
David
I thank you for sharing your journey online....it really has
inspired me to "lean into my future" with new enthusiasm.
Kay
Comments on "living the questions"
This is beyond amazing. Thanks for posting! Is this in a book?
Or where can I find this article?
Marty
I crave for more!! And will follow to find more…knowing it’s out
there:)
Lynn
Comment on "the way of the brokenhearted"
Very POWERFUL and so true!! I loves the Psalms too and know
that Gods plan is perfect! Tho He allows us storms to weather
through….His promise is that He is right there to carry us
through…if we let Him with a willingness. He has carried me
through many tough storms and through each one of them I
learn so many new things . . . Sir, I want to thank you for your
words of wisdom and too I thank God for bringing you into my
life, so I could read the beauty here on this page:)
God bless you,
Lynn
Comment on "the progression toward compassion"
This was very powerful. I’m glad I found you on WordPress as I
used to follow you on Xanga. Thanks for your work. Your
writings are both convicting and encouraging.
Captain Quaker
2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me,
Threatening the life it belongs to
And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd
Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud
And I know that you'll use them, however you want to
(Lyrics: Breathe, Anna Nalick)
Go into yourself. Find out the reason that commands you to write; see
whether it has spread its roots into the very depths of your heart; confess to
yourself whether you would have to die if you were forbidden to write. This
most of all: ask yourself in the most silent hour of your night: must I write? Dig
into yourself for a deep answer. And if this answer rings out in assent, if you
meet this solemn question with a strong, simple "I must," then build your life in
accordance with this necessity; your whole life, even into its humblest and
most indifferent hour, must become a sign and witness to this impulse.
Have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and to try to love the
questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very
foreign language. Do not search for the answers, which could not be given to
you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live
everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future,
you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.
(Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet)
"Poetry may make us . . . a little more aware of the deeper, unnamed feelings
which form the substratum of our being to which we rarely penetrate; for our
lives are mostly a constant evasion of ourselves."
T. S. Eliot, Nobel Prize acceptance speech, 1948